NETWORK LIKE YOUR GODDAMN LIFE DEPENDS ON IT! YES YOU HEARD ME! NETWORK LIKE YOUR GODDAMN LIFE DEPENDS ON IT!
Networking is a great skill, it’s a gateway skill in any career path you go down, whether that’s your place of employment or that’s your business or the entertainment industry; acting, singing, dancing.
It’s even helpful when it comes to making friends or trying to find a significant other…trying to look for some sexy mama and you’re like “hey baby, how you doing? How you doing, baby? Let me get your number!”
But look, the thing is when we are young we are taught that we shouldn’t talk to strangers and it makes sense in the context.If you are walking down the street and big ol’ Jim comes out of nowhere and says “Hey kid, you want a lollipop?”…you’re going to be like “uhhhh….”
However…when you get older you realise that networking is an important skill and you need to know how to do it effectively, you need to know how to make friends, how to influence people and literally as I say that, I really recommend that you check out and read the book “How To Win Friends & Influence People” by Dale Carnegie, because in this post some of the points which I’m going to cover is in reference to the book.
7 Super Easy Ways To Network More Effectively (& Effortlessly)
1. BE YOURSELF & BE GENUINELY INTERESTED IN OTHERS
Be your smoking hot self!
If you are yourself you will come across as a much more confident person and you will save a lot more energy and you can use that energy into the interaction with others, rather than putting that energy towards creating a fascade and create a character in front of people.
If you are yourself, if you just be confident in yourself, you take ownership of yourself, you walk into a room you’re like “yo look I’m unique, I have traits which no one else could actually provide” to that other person, you’re going to walk into the room like “yo I’m a badass!” and that’s what you are…you are a badass… you are sexy… you are confident… you look goooood!
Just walk inside the room and just be confident. When you interact with people, that confidence will then come across. They will now feel that energy then and then think “okay, this person’s genuine, this person’s real, they know who they are and they’re comfortable in their own skin”.
You’ll be calm, grounded and collected. Everything which you now do will then be grounded and will mean something.
2. SMILE
A smile is welcoming, it’s warming. It shows that I am open to you, I like you, I appreciate you enough, I’m listening to you.
You are engaging.
But what’s most important is having a real smile. People can see through a fake smile. A real smile, a genuine smile, you can see it. The smile starts from the eyes.
Your eyes will communicate to the other person what your mood is. Like they say “Your eyes are the window to your soul”.
Now if you are like any other human being sometimes you may not feel like it so…
WHAT SHOULD I DO?
If you do not feel like smiling there’s 2 things you could do…
NUMBER 1 is force yourself to smile, even if you have to separate yourself from a social situation, go into your own space and force yourself to smile. It will then uplift your whole energy because your whole body is getting involved now, your face is getting involved now and is reminding you what a real smile feels like and it will then uplift your energy.
NUMBER 2 is act as if you are already happy. ‘Happiness doesn’t depend on on outer conditions, it depends on inner conditions’. It’s basically down to your mental attitude.
Your objective is to greet people with a smile and put your soul into every handshake. Even if you wanted to touch the person, don’t hesitate and also do not be afraid of being misunderstood.
DON’T SEEK THE PERSONS APPROVAL
Just be comfortable.
‘A smile enriches those who receive, without impoverishing those who give’
A SMILE DOES WONDERS.
3. SAY THE PERSONS NAME (AS MUCH AS POSSIBLE)
‘The average person is more interested in his or her own name because it is a subtle and effective compliment’.
If someone says my name for example, I know that they are talking to me.
That’s mine.
That’s my personal brand. They’ve now got my attention. I’m now aware of that person because they’ve actually remembered my name.
The mistake most people make is that they don’t even remember peoples names, purely for the reason that they don’t take the time and energy to try to concentrate, repeat and try to fix that name within their own mind.
President Franklin D. Roosevelt for example, knew that the most simplest and most important way to gain good will from others is by remembering names and making people feel important.
Also Napoleon III , often bragged about remembering the names of everyone he met within his life.
HOW DID HE DO IT? WHAT WAS HIS METHODS?
If he didn’t hear the name properly, he’ll ask the person to repeat themselves and then the person would repeat it clearly.
If the person had an unique name, he’ll ask them how to spell it, so he could sort of fix that name within his mind.
Another thing he did is during the convo, he’ll try to repeat the persons name as much as possible and try to fix it in his mind and then try to associate that persons name with a physical attribute, so he could relate that name to that person.
TRUST ME GUYS
If you use the persons name, it will make you stand out because it gains their awareness.
Their name sets the individual apart, so it’s a compliment that you are giving to them and it shows that you are listening and paying attention. It shows that you are present with that person and they are going to appreciate you and they’re going to like you a lot more.
4. BE A GOOD LISTENER
LADIES AND GENTLEMAN, the easiest way to become a good conversationalist is by becoming a good listener because it take the empathsis off you. You could literally sit back, relax, let the other person speak and then you don’t necessarily need to have to think “ah what do I have to say next?” or “what topic to bring up?” because the other persons doing most of the work, you are literally just listening.
You have 1 mouth, 2 ears. Listen more, speak less.
Get the person to talk about themself. It gives them that sense of importance.
Most people fail to make a favourable impression because they fail to listen to others. They just think about “oh ok, what can I say next? How can I make myself look important to the other person?”, rather than actually listening to what the person has to say.
However, if you actually listen to someone, they are going to become comfortable with you and they are going to appreciate that and think “Yo! This person’s actually LISTENING” and they respect that. When it’s your turn to speak, they will do the same thing, they’re going to respect you. They are going to think “this person invested their time in me and listening to me. I have to do the same!”
So be an attentive listener. Listen carefully.
To be interesting, you have to be interested.
Ask questions that the other person would enjoy answering. Encourage them to talk about themselves and accomplishments.
The simple fact is, people are 100x more interested in themselves and their wants and problems.
So let the other person speak, listen and you can discover their problem or wants, which you can be that solution to their problem.
NOW that my friend is called forming a relationship. Now you have formed a service to that person because you thought how can I help this person.
5. TALK IN TERMS OF THE OTHER PERSONS INTERESTS
THE BEST WAY to interest people is to talk about what they treasure the most. Be prepared.
President Roosevelt (going back to him), one thing he did is that he would spend the night before meeting someone, researching about that persons interests. So when he actually comes to interacting with that person, he could now talk about that persons interests, what they treasure and what they’re passionate about. That person would then think ” oh wow cool!”. What he was practically doing is putting the emphasis on the other person to speak about their passions.
If possible, identify who is most likely going to be at that event, or that gathering and try to research who that person is, what they’re about and what actually interests them.
Talking in terms of other peoples interests, pays off for both parties. Firstly, the guy or gal talking who has that interest, gets to talk about what he/she is passionate about and secondly, you get to listen and you can actually expand your mind from hearing that persons perspective and may even lead to you have a new interest.
6. MAKE THE OTHER PERSON FEEL IMPORTANT, SINCERLY
LISTEN TO THIS…
‘The deepest principle in human nature, is the craving to be appreciated’ – William James
Also in the bible, Jesus quotes, ‘Do unto others, as you would do unto yourself’ – Luke 6:31
The reason why I mention these is that you need to able to give and what can I provide to the other person and making the other person feel important and giving them that sense of entitlement.
George Clooney actually does this very well. If you look at some of his interviews, when he’s interacting with someone who has a lower status than him, he would often ridicule himself and lower his level, so the other person feels important and allows the other person to be on the same level as him.
CHARISMA ON COMMAND EXPLAINS THIS VERY WELL IN THE VIDEO BELOW FROM 8:14
The key thing is to be ‘hearty in your approbation and lavish in your praise’ – Charles Schwarb
Have all love baby! All love! You want this come from a real and genuine place.
UNDERSTAND…You are IMPORTANT! That person is IMPORTANT! Everyone is IMPORTANT! Everyone has their own skills, everyone has their own talents. Everyone is important in their own special way. So treat people like they are!
Emerson said that “Every man I meet is my superior in some way, in that I learn from him”. Literally, everyone is important and you can learn from others!
Don’t think of yourself in a situation when you are interacting with someone, think of the other person, think of it as a learning experience. Think of the person as superior, because they have some sort of knowledge or skill which you don’t have.
Going back to my earlier point, people love to talk about themselves, so if you make someone feel important and they’re able to talk about themselves…mannnn they are going to like you a lot because they are being complimented and plus they get to speak about themself.
WOO BONUS LEVEL!
7. FIND A WAY TO OFFER A SERVICE/HELP & STAY IN CONTACT
Now before you even engage in a conversation, ask yourself…”How can I help you?”, “What service can I provide to you?”, “What characteristics or qualities do I have about myself, which is useful to you?”
If you know these things then you’re going to know what you have to offer and you’ll know your objective. To be able to give.
As you’re speaking, find out their desires and concerns. What do they want? What are they worried about? and think how can you correlate that to your skills or what you can provide to them.
Whether that’s the person is having difficulties with their business or you’re trying to date someone and being that solution. Showing your qualities to them as to showcase as to why they should date you.
Now before you ask for something, make sure you have invested into that person. Invest your time and energy into that person, because it’ll make it so much easier for you to then ask for something later on, because they know that you have actually put in the effort. So they are going to warm more to you and are going to respect you more and trust you more.
As a closer of the conversation, simply hand them your business card or exchange contact details and let them know it’s ok to reach out.
After that make sure you follow up either the day after or however many days but don’t leave it too long because otherwise they are going to forget about you and also you want to communicate to them that you are someone who does what you say you’re going to do.
If you say get someones number, a girl or boys number, you want them to remember you, you don’t want them to forget about you. They’ve probably been approached by several people in the day, so there’s a lot of people on his/her mind, however if you say the day after you meet him/her you drop a text saying “Hey, it was great meeting you yesterday!”…you may even crack a joke or something relating to the conversation you had, so they know who it is, then drop your name at the end. So now for example she is thinking “oh so this is Kyle, I met him at this time/this place and this is what we talked about” so now she remembers who I am.
So the key thing is following up. You want to make sure you follow up!
If you get rejected, don’t worry about it. Don’t take it personally, just brush it off, don’t dwell on it and keep going. That’s the best thing you could do! Keep going! Keep speaking to people, keep communicating with people, keep making new friends, keep approaching people and trying to date people, because eventually you will find the people who are meant for you and the people who will appreciate you for you and are looking for someone like you.
SO KEEP GOING! That’s the best thing you could do!
There it is...
Those are the 7 tips! I hope they were of value to you! If you gained value from it, make sure you share this post with others who you believe could gain value also!
If you follow these tips and implement often and effectively you can become a networking BEAST!
Once again, I recommend you check out the book that I mentioned earlier called How To Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie, it is definitely worth a read!